November musings

It all started with a cup. Since the weather has been cooler, I've been starting the day with a pot of tea. I have quite a few tea pots, so since I've been little by little cleaning out my china cabinet, I've been using a different one each day.  

Today's teapot was brought to you by Mikasa, via the thrift store, as are most of the teapots I have, except the one that was my mom's. 

The cup I saw when I looked in the cabinet was my mom's. I guess I've been holding on to a lot of grief these days (duh!)  I poured a cup of tea, remembering all the times I had tea with my mom, especially near the end when it was hard to know what to say. A cup of tea always helps. It made me cry, thinking that I will never have a cup of tea with my mama again. But then I laughed, because I had made lemon grass tea, and on impulse stuck a candy cane in the cup, and I really don't know that lemon grass and peppermint go together, but so what, really. It tasted pretty good. I would have gotten a raised eyebrow or an eyeroll from my mom! 

I have been thinking about getting out candles to light and pray over. But I keep thinking, well, I have to clear the table, and then etc etc etc. So I impulsively gathered a few candles and put them on my stove and lit them.

I think the big tall one was my daughter's. I know the Madonna and child one was K's mom's, and the leaf one was made for my first mother in law by my daughter and I. The jar one was from my hubby, who knows I love candles. 

So I lit the tall one for all the folks that have died this year that were a part of my life. The Madonna one was for babies... all the grandchildren I didn't get to meet, all the babies that never got to take their first breath. The leaf one was for mothers and mothers in law and fathers and fathers in law.. and the jar candle was for everybody else... and the families all over the world that are mourning because of all the pandemic deaths...

As I stood there by the stove crying and praying, I could feel a big weight lift. I have always loved candles, and as I looked at them they were all dusty... so I dusted them off, and thanked God for candles, to help us focus our prayers, and promote calmness.